Saturday, August 22, 2009

Humpty Dumpty CRACKED

Another long absence but this time I have a valid reason, I fell......down the stairs....and.....cracked my pelvis in the back near my tailbone (which I originally thought I broke).

Let me introduce myself. Hello, I am Grammy THE CLUTZ. Plain and simple. I fall alot. They built my own little fenced walkway at work after one fall---I'll go into that more later. But back to this incident.

We got some pretty heavy storms and sideways rain on Monday afternoon and after it was finished our back porch was pretty water covered and slippery. I know it gets real slippery when wet. We were oh so careful this past winter. Papa said it has to do with my sealing it and the water pools on top.

Anyway, as I've mentioned in a previous post about my Snoopy Diva refusing to walk on wet surfaces---it had rained, therefore, she was saying no thanks to going out and using the bathroom. So I usually walk out in the yard with her and sometimes that entices her to join me--you know how we women like to potty together.

So to kill two birds with one stone, I picked up a handful of newspapers and cardboard boxes to take the recycle can, slipped Papa's flip flops on (they were handy right there by the door--albeit about 3 sizes larger than I usually wear), and I stepped on the rain-slick porch. I took about two steps and thought to myself, boy it's slippery out here, I may need to dump these shoes and the next thing that happened I was going down the steps and not under the power of my legs AND was hitting HARD on those wooden steps and landed on the concrete sidewalk at the bottom. Since my arms were full with recycling, I had no way to brace myself or catch my fall. It was important, don't you know, to maintain my grip on that PAPER.

Immediately I realized, I broke both legs, my arm, my back and my butt because everything was screaming at once. I was yelling to Papa for help, not to mention the screaming that occurred during the fall but was having no luck rousing him. He had went to the basement to watch a movie and had the home theatre blasting, just like in a movie theatre, and, of course, could not hear a bomb drop in the yard let alone my cries for help.

During all this, Snoopy is still at the top of the stairs giving me looks that said, see I told you no good could come of walking on the wet. Yes, oh wise canine, I'll never pressure you again.

I managed to crawl back up the stairs and into the back door and finally Papa heard my yelling and came running. Immediately my butt swelled on one side and turned black but we determined that the rest of my limbs were unbroken. I was just going to be black and blue and sore the next day.

I made a few phone calls later when things calmed down and determined if it was my tailbone that I had broken, that I was SOL because they don't do anything for such a break. Since I had ample supply of pain pills and muscle relaxers on hand due to my neck (which was screaming as well), I figured, I'd take some of those and call it a day.

Tuesday, I could hardly move. Couldn't get out of bed and when I finally did that, could hardly walk and sitting in a chair was out of the question. Let alone a 9 1/2 hour day which are my Tuesdays at work. So I called into work to let my boss know the situation and I went and laid down. My entire left cheek continued to swell and blacken as the day progressed and I finally put a call into the doctor who couldn't see me until Wednesday afternoon but if the swelling got out of hand, head to the ER.

What, pray tell, was out of hand? Papa was laughing when I was upright because one side was twice the size of the other. He kept saying, I can't believe how obvious that is through your pants.

I made it through Wednesday with things mostly "in hand". When appointment time neared, I grabbed a few pillows and got into the car---excruciating pain just getting in the car. Made my nest as best as I could and started slowly down the street at about 10 mph. I knew I was in trouble and I hadn't gotten off our street.

SOMEHOW I made it onto the highway and to the doctor's office without dying in a fiery car accident. Endured the office visit, x-rays and blood work (all standing) and diagnosis was a crack in the pelvis area to the left of my tailbone. Healing time about 2-6 weeks, since it's in the back, we'll treat it the same as a tailbone break and DO NOTHING. He did give me a strong anti-inflamatory for about 3 weeks and a long Vicatin prescription for pain and "call if you need more." Said the stiller I was, the better/faster I would heal and maybe by Monday I could sit in a chair.'s Saturday now and I'm up to about 45 minutes in a chair and I'm going to drive myself to the Taco Bell drivethrough for lunch......maybe.

So I hurt and I'M BORED. I've read, watched movies, caught up on some old VHS tapes, slept (alot), talked and texted on the phone but I'm ready to be out and about again. I was up and doing alot yesterday and just about couldn't get out of bed this morning. Think I did too much. But that won't stop me. NO siree. This Humpty will definity be put back together again AND SOON.

In closing, I was trying to photograph my "injury" last night so you couldn't tell it was a behind (did I mention I was bored) and it didn't work so well, so I'll leave you with this tiny tidbit of a view.

and to Lana and Mr. Fun, thanks for the pretties.

A cracked Grammy.


Bacardi Mama said...

You poor thing. I fall a lot too, but never this bad. Take care!

Tammy said...

Thanks. I'm so excited today as the swelling is going down and it's not painful to sit in chairs. AW the simple things.